Tales of Rargnasha Bloodmark [Contains Bacon]

by **Rargnasha** Tue Aug 12, 2014 2:06 am

Right. On one hand, its not so much a story as it is a massive, unedited wall of text concerning Rargnasha and a bacon pie. On the other hand, it's a 33 phrases long semi-erotic saga about Rargnasha Bloodmarks epic struggle against a bacon pie. One of the Red Blades followers wanted to bake a pie, rolled 97, and this is the result.

A word of warning. This emote may be accused of containing erotica, gore, violence, bacon and other things that may be disturbing or enticing to some readers.

Reading may cause: Hunger (From bacon), Amnesia (From face palming), Eye damage (From gramatic errors), Arousal (From bacon, too) Frustration (From lack of editing).

You have been warned, read on your own volition.

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is already busy attacking the delicious meal with great savagery! He holds the pie with two hands and clenches his fingers around one of it's sides, grabbing a huge chunk of baked bread, roasted herbs and sweet, succulent but crispy bacon. –
starts showing the handful of delicious, epic meal bacon pie into his face, seemingly having no care for grace or anything else, how could he? With such a meal presented to him, there can only be one declaration, love.. And war. Two declarations.-
s’ eyes would roll slightly and he’d let out a somewhat muffled groan of bliss, chewing the delicious combination of dough, bacon and herbs, letting the soon wobbly combination be chewed and mashed between his teeth. –
would have to swallow several times, but would not mind, his tongue bathing in the mashed pie combination all the meanwhile, once done with this first bite, he would swap to a much more gentle approach to the pie. –
Picking off a single piece of bacon from its crust between two fingers, he’d raise the piece of bacon, letting it dangle before his face for a moment, then lean in to take a whiff of its oh so godly and divine scent, -
watching the small droplets of melted fat still cling to it. He’d lean in, letting his tongue run over to sample its rich and hearty flavor. Then, all grace would be thrown to the wind as he’d chomp upon the delicious strip of cooked meat. –
The crispy divine treat quickly being crushed in the orcs powerful maw, a low growl of content emanating from deep within the orcs throat, small sprinkles of bacon escaping his lips as he’d crunch ruthlessly, making their way into his beard..-
Once the treat has been devoured, he doesn’t skip on suckling on the tip of his fingers in turn, briefly, although clearly enjoying the lingering taste upon his fingers. He then, slowly, almost dramatically, realizes that the battle is not yet over…-
It has barely begun! The pie, in all of its glory, still mocks him like a wounded but proud beast, a large chunk has been torn out of it, yes, but it still stands, undefeated! Bloodmarks expression grows serious for a moment, -
Muttering a low “Challenge accepted.” He’d hold the pie in both hands, turning it so that the breach would be facing towards him, he’d eye the glorious pie, just waiting for him to make his move, and that, he would! –
Would charge at the pie relentlessly, the pie charging at him as well as he’d lift it up to him and chomp his maw down onto the crust of the pie near its breach, the delicious treat giving way to the might of fang and maw! –
He’d chew recklessly and sink the mush, letting the baked dough, herbs and meat slide down his throat, and even before it’d reach his belly he would throw himself at the pie again, biting down onto it, however, this time –
The pie would rise against his attempts! A single piece of delicious chewy bacon would not be undone, a snarl would make it out over Bloodmarks lips and for a moment, one could see the –fury- in his eyes before he’d tug -
13
The strip of bacon, while resilient, would not be held in place by its comrades and soon be yanked out of the impeccable pie formation, now alone, isolated and exposed . Rargnasha would almost gloat with victory as-
Would throw back his head, making the strip of bacon whip around briefly, before landing in his mouth! He’d chew on the conquered treat, feeling it’s soft, chewy form give way and tear underneath the harsh treatment of his sharp fangs –
He would feel the juices of the tender meet mix with the torn scraps, chuckling to himself in delight, as he would sink the mix. Soon however, the time came for the next move. He’d look over the pie.. This would take ages to eat!-
However, a cunning look would come across his features, soon the grin of a military genius executing a decisive strategy would slide across his face as he’d hold the pie on each side.. Then slowly, almost… Tenderly –
He would start lifting his hands while pressing inwards, looking at the pie with barely contained excitement as it would start to break apart at the middle.. And even when broken, he would continue, so that when the orc would finally –
Be done, he’d stand with the halves of the broken pie pressed against each other. He’d let out a cackle, celebrating his own genius as he’d stand with the EPIC PIE BACON SANDWICH! Truly a glorious mind and master strategy of his time!-
Would be beaming with pride as he’d look at his glorious invention. War machines, strategies, constructs.. All of it would pale before the simple yet glorious miracle! A moment of quiet, the calm before the storm… And then he’d attack.-
20
With no small amount of fervor he would time and time again let his maw clamp down onto the EPIC PIE BACON SANDWICH! He would have to gape as much as his jaws would allow, even having to turn the meal in his hands slightly –
To make it fit, before biting down, feeling crust, dough, bacon and herbs give way, and as he’d bite down, be mushed against each other, as the Oathbound would talk, Rargnasha would not even register it, seemingly too consumed by-
Consuming.. his meal, a growl of pleasure and bliss would make its way out of his throat as he’d lean his head back, laughing slightly in nothing short of happiness as he’d watch his meal, a small, fond sparkle in his eye –
Like a father watching his son take his first steps, hunt his first prey, make his first proper kill, all combined in once. Such unconditional love would be so very clear in the Chieftains entire body language and facial expression –
Once he finally finishes chewing and sinking, he leans in, taking a deep inhale of the EPIC PIE BACON SANDWICH! His eyes rolling slightly back as he takes in its glorious scent, before he takes yet another huge bite, half-way through the challenge-
As he chews, he draws back.. A look of doubt and of pain in his eyes, so very thirsty… But there would still be so much EPIC PIE BACON SANDWICH left! He’d let out a small snarl, was it all for naught? Would he have to bow down to this challenger?!-
No.. Never.. With a look of grim dedication in his eyes he’d glare at the EPIC PIE BACON SANDWICH! Muttering a quiet “Lok’tar Ogar”, victory or death, he’d throw himself at the pie with renewed vigor, his maw clamping down onto it-
Tearing out a huge chunk of the EPIC PIE BACON SANDWICH with great ferocity, although the treat would fight him every single step of the journey, it would be one he’d travel with a sense of duty, to finish this challenge without faltering! –
He’d the chewing the mush in his mouth almost with a grudge, either ignoring or unaware of the orcs around him trying to make contact, his entire being dedicated to this EPIC PIE BACON SANDWICH! He snarls quietly, feeling full.. But no, no surrender!-
He would only have a handful of EPIC PIE BACON SANDWICH left, he’d eye it like one would eye an armed and dangerous enemy in a duel. With a groan he’d lean his head back, opening his maw to it’s full capacity,-
preparing to give the final blow to this challenger! And then he’d launch the final attack, shoving the EPIC PIE BACON SANDWICH into his gape and chew it slowly but with dedication… So full, so thirsty.. But soon, it’d be over.. –
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He would slowly chew through the mush, his eyes narrowed in contemplation, his gaze growing soft and distant as he looks out over the vast plains of the Barrens stretching out in front of him. It had been a hard challenge –
But one that he had overcome it. It hadn’t been easy, and while he had enjoyed the challenge, it had become too much of the same, and towards the end.. Had it truly been worth it? There would be a solemn air around the chieftain –
As he’d look out over the plains.. This was just one challenge, and there would doubtlessly more waiting ahead of them.. He’d look around him, at the tribe members who had slowly begun to gather, and merely nodded his head.-
Would there be more challenges? Definitely, but they would face them… Together.

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