7. The Darksworn
Defias Brotherhood :: Library and Art section :: Nightmares of the Sandman :: Tales of the Apprentice
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7. The Darksworn
Fenuviel's gaze rested on the floor as it seemed to draw nearer. A sharp pain in his knees made him realize that he had collapsed to them, and the ringing of metal followed as his sword slipped from his limp grasp to clatter onto the stones. He felt the life drain from him as he heard Ayuria weeping across the room. She loved him. She forgave him. And he had betrayed her. He had killed her. Fenuviel Heartsong hated himself more than anyone in the world, and yet inside he felt no anger, when he knew it should be burning within him! With such the extent that he loathed himself, it should have burned him whole. Or at least, he wished it would. Just as he had wished for Fira and Ayuria to hate him. To run. It would have been so much easier to exist.
I'm so sorry, Ayuria... I failed you. I had to, I hope you understand that... I have to serve him, I have to... Someday then he'll realize...
------
Upon questioning Shagrath about happiness, the Elf had explained to him what happiness was. That everyone was a dog in a cage, and beyond the bars, just out of reach, was a piece of meat behind held in front of their noses. Everyone stepping on each other trying to get to it. Fenuviel knew he had been stepped on a good number of times, by his master too, for Shagrath was at the top of the pile. He wasn't trying to get the meat, he thought happiness to be an illusion, but he wasn't going to let anyone step on him in their foolish hopes.
But Fenuviel had thought on this a while longer, though he had never gotten to tell his master his revelation. Those that had Awakened were those that realized it was illusion, or in another manner, those that were scrambling frantically in blind hope to get a taste of that meat. Some dogs were still asleep in the corner, dreaming whatever they wished, unaware of the chaos and pain until someone stepped on their tails. Fenuviel was awake, but he didn't bother trying to climb the pile of dogs. He had found that the ground of the cage was dirt, and he was digging, digging his way out of the cage.
Now he realized his mistake. He had dug himself into a hole he couldn't get out of, but he had grown too weary to finish it. When he looked up he saw Shagrath at the top of the hill, still strong. You could help me, master. We could both escape. But that dog didn't see him down in his hole. Or if he did, he had no desire to help.
Fenuviel didn't even see that the dogs around him were beginning to kick the dirt back into the hole... burying Fenuviel Heartsong forever.
I'm sorry brother. I'm sorry father. I'm sorry master, that I could not save you either from your unhappiness. I know you suffer... Damn you.
The light faded.
Fenuviel Heartsong faded. Quietly. Into his own misery. Drowning slowly until only a quiet calm remained. The pain and anger faded and disappeared... Nothing.
"Fenuviel," Shagrath's voice commanded. The Elf lifted his head at his master's call, dead eyes returning the piercing stare that was given to him.
"Master," he responded simply. There was no warmth left in his voice that he always extended to his master. The last one Fenuviel had cared for, had made his purpose to serve and aid. His devotion remained, but for no foolish hopes, merely because it was the last thing left to do. To serve.
"I thought you said you would not let this affect your duties," Shagrath responded coldly. Fenuviel nodded. He realized where he had fallen to. He reached for his sword, returned it to its scabbard, and stood. There was a strange power within him, a strength that had been subdued before. And so much quiet. Nothingness.
"Forgive me master, I had to adjust... to the death of Heartsong," the Elf told his master. Perhaps Shagrath could not see yet how his apprentice had died.
"Do I look like a forgiving person to you?"
"Not particularly, master," Fenuviel Darksworn answered. "But I am ready now. For whatever you require,"
Darksworn had arisen.
I'm so sorry, Ayuria... I failed you. I had to, I hope you understand that... I have to serve him, I have to... Someday then he'll realize...
------
Upon questioning Shagrath about happiness, the Elf had explained to him what happiness was. That everyone was a dog in a cage, and beyond the bars, just out of reach, was a piece of meat behind held in front of their noses. Everyone stepping on each other trying to get to it. Fenuviel knew he had been stepped on a good number of times, by his master too, for Shagrath was at the top of the pile. He wasn't trying to get the meat, he thought happiness to be an illusion, but he wasn't going to let anyone step on him in their foolish hopes.
But Fenuviel had thought on this a while longer, though he had never gotten to tell his master his revelation. Those that had Awakened were those that realized it was illusion, or in another manner, those that were scrambling frantically in blind hope to get a taste of that meat. Some dogs were still asleep in the corner, dreaming whatever they wished, unaware of the chaos and pain until someone stepped on their tails. Fenuviel was awake, but he didn't bother trying to climb the pile of dogs. He had found that the ground of the cage was dirt, and he was digging, digging his way out of the cage.
Now he realized his mistake. He had dug himself into a hole he couldn't get out of, but he had grown too weary to finish it. When he looked up he saw Shagrath at the top of the hill, still strong. You could help me, master. We could both escape. But that dog didn't see him down in his hole. Or if he did, he had no desire to help.
Fenuviel didn't even see that the dogs around him were beginning to kick the dirt back into the hole... burying Fenuviel Heartsong forever.
I'm sorry brother. I'm sorry father. I'm sorry master, that I could not save you either from your unhappiness. I know you suffer... Damn you.
The light faded.
Fenuviel Heartsong faded. Quietly. Into his own misery. Drowning slowly until only a quiet calm remained. The pain and anger faded and disappeared... Nothing.
"Fenuviel," Shagrath's voice commanded. The Elf lifted his head at his master's call, dead eyes returning the piercing stare that was given to him.
"Master," he responded simply. There was no warmth left in his voice that he always extended to his master. The last one Fenuviel had cared for, had made his purpose to serve and aid. His devotion remained, but for no foolish hopes, merely because it was the last thing left to do. To serve.
"I thought you said you would not let this affect your duties," Shagrath responded coldly. Fenuviel nodded. He realized where he had fallen to. He reached for his sword, returned it to its scabbard, and stood. There was a strange power within him, a strength that had been subdued before. And so much quiet. Nothingness.
"Forgive me master, I had to adjust... to the death of Heartsong," the Elf told his master. Perhaps Shagrath could not see yet how his apprentice had died.
"Do I look like a forgiving person to you?"
"Not particularly, master," Fenuviel Darksworn answered. "But I am ready now. For whatever you require,"
Darksworn had arisen.
Fenuviel/Eidan- Posts : 145
Join date : 2010-03-13
Age : 37
Character sheet
Name: Fenuviel Mooncrow
Title: Watcher
Defias Brotherhood :: Library and Art section :: Nightmares of the Sandman :: Tales of the Apprentice
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